There is a traditional Gaelic blessing that begins 'Let the road rise up to meet you' that is said to people setting off on journeys. I am quite sure it was exactly the sentiment in the hearts of those I left behind to come to Istanbul. I think about this, almost smiling, as I feel every crooked brick under the pushchair as I go up the hills of Beşiktaş. The smooth welcoming road hoped for in the blessing cannot be found here, you just have to push over the rocks in the road.
A while ago I was really preoccupied by Anton's shyness, which was definitely worse around people who didn't speak English. When approached by someone he didn't know he would squeeze his face into the side of his pushchair and moan. When someone tried to take his hand he would wrestle free. After a particularly revealing conversation with Ville it felt clear to me that Anton was following my lead about who he really took to his heart. It wasn't that I was running away from people it was a challenge to communicate with, but I was raising my hand high when waving as if I was further away than I was, and walking a bit faster. I felt nervous communicating with curious Islanders and ashamed of my paltry language skills.
Directly after the trips to England around Neve's birth Anton would sob that he wanted to go to England when he felt particularly set upon. Something had to be done as these kinds of cultural comparisons by a three year old were doing nothing for our morale. One of the first rocks we shifted was getting residence permits for me and the children. This allowed me to make the decision not to go to the UK for a year, helping all of us to see our lives as being completely in Turkey. The next thing that happened was a beautiful flower amongst the stones, Anton felt the first flutters of love for someone outside the family. I am not at all surprised that his affection fell on my beautiful friend Sophie but I was amazed to see my little son giddy with his first crush. What power love has to stretch our boundaries! Then he had his head shaved and enjoyed a short but much enjoyed break from the cheek pinchers and we watched with delight as our shy boy begin to give his smiles more freely.
Next he made firm friends with two women, one of whom speaks no English at all, but understands the more important currency of paper boats and playing cars and treats gently given. Over the last few weeks we have watched Anton greet people, submit willingly to cuddles and melt under tickling fingers. He and I are gaining so much from our new openness. He tells us that he is not shy any-more. Turkish is much less of a foreign language to him and the days when it will be the language in which he giggles with school friends are creeping closer. The road feels smoother, though of course, this being life, I can see what needs to be tackled next......
Visit the Facebook page or the Twitter page of this blog






































































